i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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