I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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