I wanna bring you to show and tell
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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