you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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