i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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