It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize