i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Randomize