No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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