Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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