If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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