did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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