Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize