i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize