well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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