Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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