I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I just found a bag of teeth...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I need to calm my uterus...
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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