i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
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she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
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Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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