Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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