she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
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I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
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I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
My life is pants optional.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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