I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Couch. On fire.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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