Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
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It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
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My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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