You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
NoShamevember. You game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize