Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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