I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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