I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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