She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
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okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
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YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
dude. I can hear the air.
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