Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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