I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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