I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize