in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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