I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize