i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Dick very happy bro
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize