He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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