We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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