I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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