im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
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