It's Friday. Sex?
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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