so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Randomize