was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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