Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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