Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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