how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize