You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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