talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
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I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
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yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I have aggressive nipples.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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