question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
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I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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