How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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