K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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