Yo dont text me then not text me
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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