Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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