I swear she didn't look like that last week.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
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Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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